My tour of Europe has had its moments, but none like the moments I experienced while in Greece. I was on a bus from Athens to Kalamata lost in the beauty of the place my parents where born. Athens leaves little to be desired, as it poorly displays the beauty Greece has to offer its natives and visitors. Olive trees, grape vineyards and crystal waters for miles and miles. A land u
ntouched, where citizens live as they always have - off the land - with the most fresh ingredients at their fingertips. Did you know a fresh egg yolk is a bright orange color?The mountains are so close you feel as though you could reach out and touc
h them. They look perfect, almost fake. It felt surreal as I sat in silence (yes, which is not my usual nature) taking it all in and the memories came flooding back - the summers I spent as a child and adolescent.- The sounds.
- The smells of the blooming orange blossoms.
- The rooster waking me in the morning.
- The lambs happily chewing their greens with no thought that they would soon be rotating on a rotisserie for Easter.
I watched the bus driver smoke his cigarette as he drove up and down the mountain side, sipping his frappe coffee looking at his cell phone. I chuckled as I thought of what my typical reaction would be if someone was driving me up a mountain side (no gardrails, straight drop) smoking and texting. I didn't mind, I sang along to the latest Greek hits. I was in Greece.
My people smoke in airports, restaurants and bars. They actually smoke everywhere. There is talk about banning smoking, but they only laugh at how ridiculous that would be. I didn't mind. I was in Greece.
The driving - it is like nothing I have ever seen.
- People passing on the left and right.
- Passing whether the line is solid or dashed - one day I even witnessed someone passing a police officer.
- Cars passing other cars in both lanes (at the same time) with on-coming traffic at excessive speeds.
This I did mind. But I was still in Greece.
It costs one Euro to ride the bus or metro anywhere. My cousin convinced me to take the bus a couple of stops with no ticket as waiting 10 minutes for the next bus seemed to be too much. But I was caught and was fined 60 Euro. I tried to pull the dumb American card but he was just not buying it. I didn’t mind, I didn’t argue, I almost gladly gave him the money. I was in Greece.No family visit would be complete without the unrelenting pressure of getting married. Of course, there is always a guy that is “perfect”. Apparently Mr. Perfect has been waiting to meet me for two years (he saw a picture of me from my cousins wedding). I was convinced Mr. Perfect was a toothless village dweller, but he had all his teeth. In fact, his teeth looked like a perfect row of mini Chiclets. You know - the ones that used to come in the tiny envelope pack (reference pic)?
As he charged at me to introduce himself, I was convinced had there not been a desk between us he would have picked me up, thrown me over his shoulder, and carried me out.To humor my family I proceeded to have small talk with him. I was at my cousin’s office, as I needed internet access to be able to work (things to wrap up before I was “officially” on vacation). He finally stopped with the small talk and began speaking with someone else. I took that as a cue for me to continue to work, as that was what I had set out to do and he had interrupted me.
When I began to type one of my long-winded emails he proceeded to tell me how rude I was being and how having that much focus on one particular thing was a bad tendency to have.
I thought to myself - me rude? How can I explain to Mr. Know-it-all what rude is? I know how about I tell him if he doesn’t stop interrupting me he is going to have a mouth full of bloody Chiclets? Just the thought of it put a smile on my face, which I am sure he thought was for him.
Was it his presumption of what was good for me that did him in? Or was it the presumption that I of course would throw myself at him because he wanted me to that did him in? Maybe it was the way he informed me he would pick my up in two hours for coffee and then drop me off when we were done talking about my bad tendencies?
Poor bastard - he had no idea who he was dealing with. When I didn’t comply with the coffee, the request to call him, or changing my views on life, there was more unrelenting pressure to get it together and realize this was my chance. Eventually I had to threaten that I would never come back for it to all stop. And by stop I mean they continued to make snyde comments about my attitude and demmand that I change my thinking.
I would just sing a verse from one of my favorite Greek songs.
“Δεν παντρεύoμαι, δεν παντρεύoμαι, και δεν νοικοκυρeνομαι…”
It won’t translate exactly, but you will get the point!
I was in Greece.
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